The Reality of Having a Baby
“I’m pregnant, we are having a baby!” The news was what I was hoping for, the excitement of this news is tangible, and I am over the moon with happiness.
Everyone asks, when is the baby due and I tell them with a great rush of love, yes, that is what the feeling is, an intense feeling of love. Funny, it feels different to any love I had felt before.
At that time in my life I was working full-time, fulfilling my dream of being a nurse, so working shifts on nights and days, and being on call was something I was used to doing. Having a baby would be a breeze. I loved my time on the 
maternity ward, with family and friends visiting bringing flowers and gifts for mainly the baby sometimes for the new Mum.
I was on duty in the labour ward when my girlfriend came in to have her first baby, she delivered him, jumped off the labour bed walked down the passage to the smoking room and had a smoke. When I delivered my baby I went into a severe state of shock and had to have my bed elevated and be wrapped in a shock blanket. What a difference!
Ten days later I was home with my beautiful new baby girl. And now the reality sets in every day something changes.
As new parents we are thrilled with our new baby girl, we had to adjust some things in our relationship that is for sure. The weeks and months go by, and the flurry of visitors diminishes, and I am feeling the “weight” of the new arrival. Tired sore and unhappy with the weight from the pregnancy has not suddenly disappeared. I am not sure why I thought it would disappear or how it would given it took 9 months to put it on.
I hear so many couples say that having a baby won’t change their life or lifestyle. Having had my children and been through the changes I muse at this idealology. How could it be that another person enters the relationship and not any other person but one that this fully dependent and knows only to scream or cry to get what it needs?
The physical changes in the mother’s body create a new awareness of self-esteem and a sense of being worthy. The father often feels left out and no longer is his passionate wife so passionate toward him.
Having a baby is a wonderful time, and if you are a new parent or planning to have a baby, I would like to share a few tips for you to make it the most wonderful time for you and your baby.
- Give yourself time to get to know your baby by being home in th first few weeks and nourishing each other with love and gentleness.
- Baby has been in a warm secure place for 9 months, swaddle baby in a wrap to mimic that comfy warm, secure place.
- Create a quiet peaceful space for the baby to sleep
- Give yourself plenty of time to rest and nurture yourself.
- Make time to be a couple as you were before the baby arrived and embrace the love that you share.
