Nearly 14 years ago, I ended up in the ER feeling like I was going to die. Not once, nor twice, but three times! Physically, there was nothing wrong with me. Mentally and emotionally, though, there was a lot going on. I was going through an acute expression of anxiety. I was experiencing panic. Life was just feeling ‘too much,’ too challenging, too uncertain, and I didn’t know how to deal with that. I felt lost. I felt I had no control.

My story is very similar to that of many other people. I see it in my practice all the time. When we are under a lot of pressure, or experiencing heightened amounts of stress, unfamiliarity, change or challenge (all flavours of uncertainty) and we don’t have the awareness and the tools to move through those times, we tend to want to check out. It feels like we can’t handle life with all of that. We simply don’t want to have to experience that discomfort! And this is when responses like anxiety, panic, depression, etc., can kick in. In a way, they become the response to that feeling of uncertainty, like a strategy for survival, to help us deal with all the things we feel we can’t control.

Here’s the thing: there’s something you can control, and that is YOU. Your mindset, the meaning you give to situations, and how you feel. This is when we start becoming emotionally fit.

Uncertainty, the precursor of growth

Uncertainty offers us every day the opportunity to grow. It is by meeting challenges that we learn new things, that our skill sets improve and expand, that new ideas are born! Uncertainty is necessary for our development, and ultimately for our evolution, without it, we die. And guess what? Uncertainty is the only certain thing there is, isn’t it ironic? (Alanis Morissette was onto something in the 90’s, wasn’t she?) And when we embrace it as a natural part of our everyday life, we become better equipped to move through whatever life throws at us.

Beginning the journey towards emotional fitness

You might be thinking, “Oh, that sounds lovely! But how do I actually do that??” Amazing question!

Joe Pane, the creator of the Emotional Fitness Formula, and one of my mentors, says that Emotional Fitness is measured by the quality of our relationship with uncertainty, and whether we are correlating uncertainty with fear, or with growth. Interesting point, right?

So, the first step towards emotional fitness is to start dissolving that correlation between the unfamiliar and uncomfortable with fear, and to start asking yourself the questions like: what can I learn from this? Is there another meaning I can give to what’s happening in my life right now? How is this happening FOR me, instead of TO me? Your perspective is one of your biggest allies in this process.

And with patience, kindness and with lots of determination, start dipping your toes into experiences that help you expand your comfort zone. Maybe it’s joining that salsa class you’ve been apprehensive of, or asking that person on a date, or simply choosing to say “no, thank you” instead of always saying yes. Little by little, you will build that muscle of self-trust that will ultimately hold you through the daily uncertainties of life.

You are the captain of this journey. You get to choose how to navigate it. Which compass will you choose: fear or growth?

 

If you are curious to learn more about emotional fitness, breathwork and self discovery, I invite you to follow me on Instagram or Facebook @theloveapproachproject, LinkedIn or visit my website https://loveapproachproject.com/

 

By Laura Gutiérrez

 

Laura Gutiérrez is a versatile wellness professional with over a decade of experience in Vibrational Medicine & Coaching. Laura helps people transform their relationship with uncertainty with the use of breathwork, emotional fitness coaching and vibrational medicine so that they can navigate the stress, changes and the inevitable challenges that life brings with calm and confidence.

She runs online and in person private and corporate workshops, group events and also works 1:1 sessions with clients. Her client base includes companies such as P.E. Nation, McGrath Real Estate, Don Adan Coffee, Our Yoga Space, among others. She is based in Sydney, Australia.

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Jordan
Jordan
1 month ago

Thanks for sharing your experience Laura!

Michael
Michael
1 month ago

So true Laura! Well to answer your question, I choose growth!

Lap-Tin
Lap-Tin
1 month ago

Definitely emotional resilience & fit is an important thing. A very insightful piece. Love it!

Jenna Oberstein
Jenna Oberstein
1 month ago

So well written, love your work Laura!

Gitika Merani
Gitika Merani
1 month ago

Reflects your true passion Laura, a great read. Definitely choosing yourself and having a growth mindset is key to emotional success.

Irina
Irina
1 month ago

Hi Laura,
I love the question: What is it doing for me? Uncertainty is a beast but you have to reframe it. Growth is the way to go!

Adam
Adam
1 month ago

Great article Laura! And good on you for having the courage to be so vulnerable.

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